A Challenge

Oh, how I love this girl. I tell her every day, all day. I speak words of love and truth over her constantly. I pray for her, love on her, snuggle her, comfort her, care for her, encourage her, challenge her, build her up, and do everything I can to help her be the best human possible.

I’ve got a point, other than the fact I love my girl to the moon & Paris and back.

My counselor gave me a challenge on Monday. It’s not the first time she has given me this challenge and it may not be the last. I’m sure I will continue to get this assignment until I master it.

She knows how much I love my daughter and how I speak to her and how I am working so hard to speak affirmations of love and truth into her.

So the challenge was this: Speak to yourself the way you talk to your daughter. Make your self-talk sound the same as when you are talking to that punkin you love more than anything.

Boom. Mic Drop.

Ever tried this? I challenge you.

I can see how it could change your world, but it feels so foreign. Like, Good morning self. I love you. I love you so much. Are you ready for a great day? You are so strong and kind and hardworking, I know it’s going to be wonderful today.

That IS how I wake my girl up. That is NOT what my self-talk sounds like in the morning.

Hey self, I know you made a mistake there but you were doing the best you could. Everyone makes mistakes and we learn and grow from mistakes. I’m so proud of you for trying and working hard. Let’s grow from this.

Well, that’s what I’d say to Rae. Not exactly how I treat myself when I screw up. But why? Why can I help her to understand that everyone makes mistakes and that mistakes a part of learning and growing and yet berate myself for hours or days when I make a mistake?

Self, you are beautiful – inside and out. I saw how you reached out to that friend there. You are making a difference in her life. What you do matters. What you do is important. Keep being awesome. Keep looking for ways to help. I love you!

Well, let me just ask you this. How often do you tell yourself how much you love yourself? Do you love yourself? Apparently, we should tell ourselves too. I mean, that’s part of my daily every day, practically every hour talk to my kid so that means it must become a routine talk to myself as well, right?

It’s sad that it feels so weird to talk so lovingly to myself. We are so used to being hard on ourselves and kicking ourselves and putting ourselves down… in our heads, of course, where no one else can see or hear, but it’s there nonetheless. And it’s doing big damage. We must change it!

We need to talk to ourselves the way we talk or would talk to our sons and daughters that we adore. We need to let ourselves know how much we love ourselves. We need to speak words of love and truth ourselves constantly. We need to be gentle, loving, and kind with our self talk.

And we need to do it no matter how weird it feels, how awkward it seems, how uncomfortable it makes us. We need to do it until it feels just as normal as when we say it to our kids.

And by doing so, we will change our lives.