Yesterday, I wrote about the fact that my personal mountain to climb is healthy eating habits and avoiding fast food. The encouragement I received was so special. Thank you so much to those that reached out!
On the way to school, when often we would drive thru for breakfast, I asked my daughter to help me. I told her that I wanted to be more healthy and there was something that only she could do for me – Tell me No to Drive Thru. If anyone else were to tell me what to do, I’d get mad – but not my 8 year old who loves me and wants to help me be healthy. So I told her my struggles and asked for her help.
There’s two reasons I’m sharing this today. The first reason is because I believe it’s so important to share our struggles with our kids. They need to know that we fail too. If we hide our struggles and pretend we are all good, all the time, we become unrelatable. Our kids fail sometimes. They struggle. Will they come to a parent that, in their eyes, never struggles? Will they even think we understand? I think not. They can not relate to us.
By sharing our struggles with our kids, we let them know that we are not perfect either. That failure and struggle are a part of life and how we handle it is what is most important. By sharing our weaknesses, we show that we are still valuable and worthy of help and change… And we have the opportunity to model the right behavior and the right way to handle struggles and failures. We can show that we do not give up, we do not accept failure, we get up and try again. Then, when they need that advice, it’s not just words. They have seen it in action. So important.
The second reason I’m sharing is because of how my daughter reacted. We have both been in counseling for, let’s see, five years! Wow. During these five years, we have both learned so many strategies for coping, for thriving, for growing… and my 8 year old punkin fell back on one immediately. It made me laugh as much as it made me so incredibly proud.
She said, “Ok, Mommy. Let’s practice. Do you want to go to McDonalds?”
Slightly confused, I hesitated before asking, “Do you want me to say no?”
“Yes! We are going to practice this now. Say No,” she explained.
“Ooook. No, I do not want to go to McDonalds.”
The conversation continued with “Do you want to go to Wendys? Do you want some Burger King?”
I kept saying “No. Nope, Don’t want it.” Even though, to be honest, it all sounded good.
“Do you want a Chick Fil A Chicken Biscuit?” She asked last. That’s my favorite. Stinker.
“OOoooh that’s a hard one. No! No! I don’t want it. It’s not healthy!” I replied.
“Oh Mommy,” Rae said. “See? You are getting better at this already.”
I love my kid. 🙂
She knows that mental rehearsal is so important. Practicing what you WANT to be, pretending to be what you want to be, acting as if… these are powerful tools. They have the power to change your whole mindset. When you say what you want, even if you don’t believe it at the time, things shift in your brain… and if you say it enough, you even start to believe it.
This is similar to I ams. Speak what you WANT in your life – even if it doesn’t exist yet. Persist. Don’t give up… Keep saying it. You will change your life, beginning with your thoughts. This is your superpower.
I am healthy. I make healthy choices. I do not want fast food. I crave healthy real food to fuel my body. I feel good. I am healthy.
What I ams/mental rehearsal do you need to speak over yourself today?